Roles Comparison

What do you believe about roles in marriage? Close your eyes and place up between 1-5 fingers. 1=strongly agree; 2=mildly agree; 3=not sure; 4=mildly disagree; 5=strongly agree

1. The husband is the head of the home.
2. The wife should not be employed outside the home.
3. The husband should help regularly with the household chores.
4. It is all right for the wife to initiate love-making with her husband.
5. The husband and wife should plan the budget and manage money matters together.
6. Neither the husband nor the wife should purchase an item costing more than $100 without consulting the other.
7. The father is the one responsible for disciplining the children.
8. A wife who has special talent should have a career.
9. It is the wife’s responsibility to keep the house neat and clean.
10. The husband should take his wife out somewhere twice a month.
11. It is the husband’s job to do the yard work.
12. The mother should be the one who teaches values to the children.
13. Children should be allowed to help plan family activities.
14. Children develop better in a home with parents who are strict disciplinarians.
15. Money that the wife earns is her money.
16. The husband or wife should have at least one night a week out with his/her friends.
17. The wife should always be the one to cook.
18. The husband’s responsibility is to his job and the wife’s responsibility is to the home and children.


Roles are something we’ve all heard of, and our parents probably had some sort of roles. But really, if there’s something the husband is good at, let him do it. The same goes for the wife. Don’t stress out if he ends up making dinner more than she does, or if she works outside the home and he doesn’t. If you can both be happy in the role you’re in, go for it.

I look for differences in the fingers. We talk about those they disagree about and see why. Personally, I think roles are helpful to a point. If a man and woman fulfill "traditional" roles, great. If not, as long as they can work together....that's the main thing. The only one I stick with firmly is #1, the husband as head of the wife, with an understanding of "headship" from Christ as the head of the church.